Friday the 13th
THE FINAL CHAPTER…?
On a sleepless night, tossing
and turning in my bed, during one carefree summer from my youth, I decided to
sneak from bed and try catching some late night television. I knew I would catch a scolding if caught;
late night TV was adult prime time, not for kids. Who knew what sick crap awaiting me, just on
the other side of the screen? When I
made my way to the family room where we kept our television set (it was still during
the time when having one was enough), I noticed a faint glow coming from the
room. The boob tube was already occupied,
but by whom? Entering my family’s living
room I was surprised to find my mom and baby brother watching the sultan of
slaughter, Jason, in the Final Chapter.
I think he was on an opposite schedule then, sleeping during the day,
screeching at my parents at night, so I figured my mom was just trying to pass
the time until he went back to dreamland and left her in peace. I can’t remember precisely at what point in
the movie I sat down for, but I do remember seeing Jason unmasked and having my
prepubescent mind blown wide open. My
mom was quick to cover my brother’s eyes, but I’m betting cold cash she
regretted not being able to cover her own!
That gnarled, pale face haunted my nights and waking day dreams for some
time to come, and I was hooked on a feeling.
The Final Chapter was my gateway drug to the gore soaked kingdom of
slasher films and stands as my favorite in the entire series. Before I snatch the new TFC threads from Fright-Rags,
I wanted to spend some time musing over the film itself.
Any movie without exploding
titles is completely understated. BOOM!
Friday the 13th in ya face!
Then a helicopter! This is a big
budget film, get a whirly bird in there; give the audience some gusto for their
Benjamins. Jason left a sloppy mess, but
this time they got him? Guess again
bozo. Jason’s just napping, and
apparently he’s a restless sleeper with rubber arms. An axe to the noggin will do that. Then some guy in the helicopter calls out
over a speaker “Okay boys and girls lets get going”. I’m no expert in police procedure, but
something tells me that they don’t wrap up crime scenes like that. Maybe it was happy hour or Tully’s Tenders
were like two for one or something.
I loved the way the camera
settled on the camp for a few moments in the beginning after the police leave
and turn all the lights out, so all you hear is the sound of the wildlife by
the lake. Those quiet, eerie moments
really stand out to me. That one shot of
the lake in the silent dark does more to unsettle me than everything that
happened in the film prior. We’re taken
to the hospital where we get a quick glimpse of Chris from the previous entry
weeping into the caring arms of her parents.
I liked that nod of continuity. Then
we follow Jason to the morgue, where Axle the horn-ball mortician slides him into
the corpse freezer, but JESUS JUMPING CHRISTMAS SHIT, what’s this? A small wisp of breath escapes the supposedly
dead serial killer just before Axel closes the door to the meat locker. Jason had a power nap, but he’s back for the
body count and more brutal than ever.
Axel gets his head grotesquely sawed snapped backwards; the nurse is
disemboweled with a scalpel, then its happy trails for Jason, all the way back
to the lake.
Perhaps wishing to pay
respect, he stops at his mom’s grave.
The grave itself is seemingly located right off the main road to Crystal Lake. It’s practically right on the curb. I wonder if the authorities put her cemetery
plot there on purpose, kind of like on e last “fuck you” from the good citizens
of Crystal Lake
to the Voorhees clan. I can’t imagine
them being all too pleased to be forever associated with the “curse” of Crystal Lake, and I’m
sure emotions over the massacre ran deep, especially in a town that small. Jason finds a hitchhiker hanging out by his
mother’s burial plot. Wrong place to
have a picnic lady; she’s quickly dispatched while eating a banana, although it
remains a mystery whether Jason ate the rest of the banana after or not.
We’re introduced to the Doyle’s
and I can understand Zito’s inclusion of the family element for the first time
in the series. When you see teens in
these kinds of movies they are automatically assumed to be meat for the proverbial
slasher grinder. However a family has
some genuine emotional attachment, there’s more of a sense of loss after their
death. I hated that they chose to gloss
over the death of Tommy Doyle’s mom; she deserved a better send off. By the end I practically forget she was
around in the first place, and I thought her and Trish had a great dynamic. They certainly seemed like a good mother and
daughter pair, a natural fit. Along with
Tommy Doyle they really did seem like a normal family. There’s a warmness there that is lacking in
the characters from subsequent entries.
Tommy Doyle is the kid I want
to be still. He plays space ship video
games and customizes horror masks in the middle of the woods; sounds pretty rad
from where I’m sitting. When The Final
Chapter first came out everyone was surprised that the kid killed Jason at the
end, but now it seems like a foregone conclusion. Tommy understood monsters, and what made them
tick, so he was able to pull some mind fudging on the poor mongoloid. Fangoria saves lives! If Jason ever comes at you just shave your
head, all will be well. Much like Phil
Collins, he has a soft spot for hair loss.
Slasher films are usually
sprinkled with a good dose of teenage sexual angst, but this movie is just
bursting at the seams with it; sex sells and really what else are teens
supposed to be doing? Crispin Glover is trying to hit some rebound sex, Ted is
desperately looking for any angle or gimmick to get at the pussy, there are
some Double-Mint twins thrown in the mix, I bet Jason could smell those raging
hormones from across the lake. I don’t
think these people have a clue about how to shotgun beer though.
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