Friday part 5 is cool...yar beyond be SPOLIERS!

In defense of Friday the 13^th part 5:  The New Beginning

In the Friday the 13^th: The Final Chapter Jason met his embarrassing defeat at the hands of Corey Feldman, so it should come as no surprise that he wasn’t in the mood to resurface for the 5^th entry in the series.  If Corey Feldman beat you at anything would you want to show your face in public anytime soon?  I didn’t think so.

 Friday the 13^th part 5 gets a lot of shit for not having the “real” Jason in it.  He’s only shown in hallucinations and dreamlike illusions.  The real killer is a copycat.  He’s an ambulance driver named Roy.  There, I fucking spoiled it for the people that didn’t catch the obvious wink-wink, nudge-nudge moments in the film showing Roy’s reaction to his dead son Joey and subsequent “Are you talking to me Sheriff?” dialogue.  And while some people might find Roy a poor substitute for a killer mongoloid in serious need of swimming lessons, I found it thematically appropriate.  The original Friday the 13^th was about a mother’s reaction to grief over her son’s death (or presumed death).  The fifth entry deals with a father’s reaction to his son Joey’s death, which is a theme that ties the series together with its roots quite nicely.  Joey is even represented as a social outcast, much like Jason was said to be; ignored and physically different from his peers, and his death triggers a lethal response in Roy much the same way news of Jason’s drowning triggers Pamela Voorhees to kill.  And their purpose for killing seemed to extend way beyond mere revenge.  It seemed apparent to me that both of them wanted to memorialize the deaths of their children whose mistreatment by the world would have otherwise gone completely forgotten while simultaneously attacking a society they believed had let them down some way.  Their failure to protect as guardians was placed on the failure of society to protect its innocent, and thus they set out to prove the NIHILISTIC reality that nobody is ever truly safe via enacting revenge.

I’m glad they kept Jason dead for this installment.  I love the big loaf like most fans but his time was done, and keeping him dead is much better than bringing him back to be some cheesy ass superhuman Frankenstein monster.  The film makers themselves couldn’t even play it with a straight face anymore, adding little cutesy tongue in cheek garbage to the script every chance they got, like having Jason do a James Bond impression, or being resurrected by lightning, or knocking over some punk kid’s stereo in Manhattan.  FUCK.  Friday the 13^th parts six through ten are fun films, sure, but they are also fucking retarded, and they are anything but suspenseful and terrifying.  If anything fans should be pissed that Jason came back as such a hollow mockery of his former self to piss all over the tenuous legacy of the Friday the 13^th films.       

I hope everyone is enjoying the fine spring air.  The first wisps of summer air have crept into the crypt, and it couldn't be more wretched.  This summer Cropsy will have his revenge, so much to do...so many graves to dig...so little time...