Monday, June 17, 2019

Never Hike Alone

Never Hike Alone I am honestly not sure what state the Friday the 13th franchise is in, and who owns what, to me thats all slick lawyer mumbo jumbo, but one thing is probably for sure; you cant count on a new Friday the 13th movie to hit the screens anytime soon, which is a major bummer for this diehard slash-head.  Luckily some fans are keeping the dark spirit of the franchise alive, and the curse of Crystal Lake lives on through fan films and fiction.  Never Hike Alone might be the best fan movie I have ever seen.  With no budget and a very limited cast they managed to capture that classic Friday the 13th feel that the highly polished refake seemed to miss; the tension and atmosphere is all there in spades.  The setup is a lone hiker creating Youtube videos of his solo hiking adventures stumbles upon Crystal Lake Camp, something he has only heard about in ghost stories from his older brother.  After wandering the camp grounds, he quickly discovers Jason is real, and hes still out there.  This simple setup works magnificently for the length of the movie, which seemed perfect at the 1 roughly hour mark.  After spending the night running away from the teleporting masked killer, the hiker, at the end of his frayed wits, is rescued by an ambulance, with none other than the original Tommy Jarvis from part 6 at the wheel!  Axel from Friday the 13th part 5 is also name dropped, so is Sean Cunningham (Cunningham Road).  Jason attacks the ambulance, killing two of Tommys coworkers, and speeds off into the night with the hiker in tow, now insane with fright.  I loved it, simple, atmospheric, with all the Friday tropes of boobs and blood.  Definitely check it out maggot-heads!    

Thursday, June 13, 2019

Black Christmas remake - Blumhouse

Jason Blumhouse seems intent on nabbing up all the golden 80's horror properties, which I guess I am fine with as long as we get some quality stalk and slash.  The last Black Christmas remake was cheesy over-the-top fun where the killer whittles down candy canes with his teeth and stabs unsuspecting airhead sorority girls, but it doesn't hold a candle to the original, which I consider to be one of the essential slasher movies, and a pinnacle of the form, right up there with Halloween and Psycho.  Here's hoping this goes more for the creep out than the gross out, but I will be happy with either.  Just don't make it another horror-lite movie for tweens who need a safe space.

NECA Freddy Vs. Jason ultimate figure

I think this might be my favorite looking incarnation of Jason. 

This beast comes out 7/31/19.

Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Eat pizza, worship horror!

This is just a daily reminder to eat pizza, worship horror!  Hope you couch potatoes are getting out to the remote places of the world, performing dark rituals at the altar of the slasher! 

Friday, June 7, 2019

Gutter Garbs 4 day Friday the 13th part 6 shirt sale

I dig it like the grave, get me the long sleeve to cover up the scars.  Have a good weekend flesh fiends!

Gutter Garbs 4 day sale

Thursday, June 6, 2019

NECA Halloween 2 Ultimate figure

Too rad...Halloween 2 might just be my favorite movie like evarrrr...this is a must have for me.  And Halloween 3 toys on the way?  NECA you are really going after my frozen black heart.

Mondo Halloween Tikis

A little late to this party too, but only fashionably so, these TIKI MUGS based on Halloween look groovy, too bad this bodascious black one is already sold out...looks like only the "Alamo brown" ones are left at the moment:

Halloween tiki